The Dating Puzzle

By Nick Campbell:

Today’s singles navigate a trickier dating landscape than ever before. Men get written off for the most superficial things. Women are passed over for stupid things and the cycle just continues. What’s changed from prior generations to today’s times has always intrigued me. But I can say this: If you’re single and wondering why, ask yourself if you have balance. People who are single or otherwise always struggle to find balance. But what does it mean for you? With balance you can see things for how they really are and not how you’d like them to be. Once you’re able to do that you’ll be more likely to give people a little slack. Degrees, credit scores, and bank accounts all go to the wayside. Why? With balance you see what you need and not what you necessarily want.  The key is to have a good ability to balance your life and move forward!


Your happiness is contingent on your ability to overcome adversity.



The biggest obstacle to our own happiness comes from our inability to move on. It affects our professional lives, love lives, and even our family. If you’re pissed off all the time and put out bad energy, trust that others will feel it. Leaving a bad relationship can put you in the same situation. You’re upset about the break up and end up going around with a bad attitude and snap on your kids. Is that fair to them? Better yet, is that fair to yourself? I’m sure you can see the problem with that. This can even apply to our professional lives. It can also apply to our family lives too! So by moving on and healing you do yourself the biggest favor.


You can’t open new doors without closing the old doors…


Holding on to old baggage will keep you single for a long time. Don’t you feel that you to deserve to be happy? I can assure you that the person you broke up with is not likely to be loathing about you. They’re happy, they’re enjoying their new mate. But if you’re the one who is newly single as a result, it doesn’t mean you have to try and match them. You don’t need to be in a band aid relationship by merely replacing your ex. Enjoy your new singlehood. Get to know yourself a little better. There is a hidden gem in being newly single: Clarity! No distractions and a new ability to understand in depth what you like and don’t like. That’s golden and proof that keep it moving works!


Put the pieces back together!

It’s time to stop being petty and trivial over things we cannot control. I’ve heard the complaints of women around things like: Employment issues, credit issues, or even career aspirations. But think about how the pendulum swings! You’re doing well now, but what if something happens to knock you off track? Would you consider yourself unattractive? You’d still consider yourself valuable, so why reduce someone else’s value for the same circumstance?


Remember, doing it moving is easier said than done. But it has so much value to it and will help you grow as a person. Not to mention you get to claim a little bit of that happiness back with each passing moment.  To not let a bad relationship become the standard bearer of all your future relationships is critical!


Till next time TRP!



About Nick Campbell

Nick Campbell has written 163 post in this blog.

A modern day gentleman who loves to explore all aspects of relationships and discuss problems this new generation faces in love. Born and raised in the Bay Area, well traveled and cultured. Single Dad, tech connoisseur and news junkie. Drop a line if there is something you'd like discussed!