Setting the tone..

By Nick Campbell:

No one likes disappointment, as a matter of fact people deplore it so much they will go through lengths to avoid it. It rings no truer than in the bedroom. Many nights people are setting the hype to unrealistic levels and with pretty lasting consequences. Example, the guy who puts it on so thick about how he’s gonna make her scream. Two whole minutes later? It’s all over and she lies in disappointment. Don’t laugh yet ladies, you guys do it too. Get us all hyped up for the best time we ever had in our life. Then what happens? Headache, tired, hungry, sleepy ETC ETC. It’s no different then when the guy busts prematurely, even worse, when he doesn’t perform at all. Lesson learned: Under-promise and over-deliver. You can do this in many ways. First, tone down the expectations. Instead of verbalizing what you plan to do, show them. Some are misled to believe that if you make verbal what’s about to happen, then somehow the other person gets hot and heavy. This maybe the case, or maybe not. But what it does do for sure is set an expectation. Once that tone is set, then how do you plan to avoid the trap of disappointment?


Don’t set fires you don’t plan to put out! 


Ladies, like you, men don’t like to be teased or led on. Especially in the bed! We honestly despise the classic headache cliche. Matter of factually, hit us with the sleep one and we’ll hit you with the sneak attack. During spooning you guys are pretty vulnerable to this one! So my advice? Don’t even go there unless you’re ready. I think the golden rule applies here yes?


Fellas, it’s best to keep it quiet and let  your man do your talking. 


There is nothing better than keeping your sexual cards close to the chest. You already know you can put it down and you likely will. But it’s a lot more powerful when you don’t mention it at all. Let her think everything is sweet and then hit her with the Melvin! Trust that the Melvin will have her telling all of the home girls about you, believe that!

Till next time TRP! 




About Nick Campbell

Nick Campbell has written 163 post in this blog.

A modern day gentleman who loves to explore all aspects of relationships and discuss problems this new generation faces in love. Born and raised in the Bay Area, well traveled and cultured. Single Dad, tech connoisseur and news junkie. Drop a line if there is something you'd like discussed!