A common complaint in marriage is that it lacks the spontaneity and excitement of dating. Mundane tasks and routine schedules can lead a husband and wife to feel like their relationship is missing the spark it once had. As a couple, rekindle that fire by remembering these five tips and incorporating them into your marriage.
What special things did you do, think or feel while dating? Try to incorporate that same attitude into your life now as a married couple. Go for a drive together, text or IM each other during work, or go out for ice cream on a week night. Instead of talking about work or the kids, get to know each other all over again. Focusing on each others’ thoughts, feelings and opinions will remind you why you fell in love in the first place.
Sleeping in the same bed or watching TV together doesn’t count; just because you live in the same house doesn’t mean you shouldn’t regularly schedule quality time to spend together. Be proactive and plan dates, go out with friends and pick up hobbies together. Whether it’s going out for dinner, attending an art show or putting on a sexy bikini and heading to the hot tub, make time for just you and your husband. The extra effort will make all the difference.
Marriage can overlook appearance — that’s part of what makes it so great. Being make up free, lazy and comfortable together allows couples to let their guard down and be themselves around each other. Don’t lose sight of this bond, but don’t forget to dress up for each other every once in a while either. This simple act can have a domino effect in your relationship. Showing that you respect yourself and want to look nice for him can increase both of your self-esteems.
What’s meaningful and romantic to you may change after marriage. While flowers and cheap wine may have done it for you in the past, help around the house may be what you’re looking for now. Get to know each others’ love language and realize it may change — year after year. This knowledge can help you understand each other as a couple and be fulfilled as individuals.
Acknowledge when your husband does something for you, even if it’s as simple as taking out the trash or making your lunch. Being grateful for each other and the things you do to help one another can instantly bring the romance back into your marriage. Focusing on the good can help you realize how insignificant the bad is. Plus, it will encourage him to keep up the good work.