Stuck In A Rut

By Nick Campbell:

Complacency, monotony, sheer boredom. All could be on the list of top 3 ways to kill a marriage/relationship. But it’s not enough to know the things that can kill it, rather the key is to avoid it altogether. Our lives are so busy with careers, kids, financial troubles, you name it. Stress levels for married and coupled adults are at an all time high. According to a study by the American Psychological Association, the amount of stressed adults rose from 5.2% to 6.2% in 2011. So as a couple what can be done to keep your stress levels down and your relationship happy?

I’m inclined to go with the classic cliche of vacation. But let’s be honest here, when we go on vacation we have the blackberries, iPads, and laptops in tow. Meaning we haven’t disconnected enough to get the full impact of being on a vacation. Not to mention the worry about the soaring costs of these vacations will bear on some people’s minds the whole time. You could also point to our favorite happy place: The bedroom…But again, with high stress levels are you going to be able to perform at your best in the bedroom? Some can put aside their lives distractions in order to get it in. But most will have a hard time there. So even with sex sometimes we can’t escape the burdens of life.

So what’s next? If stress is getting the better of you and your relationship, there are some methods that are proven to work. You can do them together, sometimes it’s beneficial to do them alone. Sometimes we need that alone time to get our heads straight. However, the question can turn into: Would you be ok with your partner going on a “self searching” mission? Would they be able to get away and de-stress without suspicion? Combine these personal factors with relationship conflict and you’ve got a formula for separation. But can two people hold it together under pressure?

Find a way to “reconnect”

Your partner is exactly that, your partner in life. You’re not alone in these stuggles. Confide in them, share your struggles and fears with them. Sometimes the ability to share this burden can be a huge relief. Most partners who love you will be more than willing to take it off your shoulders.

Simply put, have some fun together! 

Make it a point to find ways where you can get out and enjoy free time together. It may be easier said than done but with planning, desire, and ambition this ultimate de-stresser works! Too many couples aren’t making time to keep dating each other. But if you don’t the stress will continue to build with serious consequences. This build up is one of those things that can creep up on you. Don’t let it put your relationship in the dumps!

Till next time TRP!..



About Nick Campbell

Nick Campbell has written 163 post in this blog.

A modern day gentleman who loves to explore all aspects of relationships and discuss problems this new generation faces in love. Born and raised in the Bay Area, well traveled and cultured. Single Dad, tech connoisseur and news junkie. Drop a line if there is something you'd like discussed!