Togetherness doesn’t just cover family and friends. Togetherness is something felt. If a person is happy it’s difficult for that happiness not to spill over onto others. To be together as an individual is to feel secure, in your surroundings, in your ability to draw people around you like a shawl, or more importantly to be that shawl.

When home and heart are as one it has the capacity to hold the joys and pains, dreams and fears of all who enter it, tenderly, compassionately, securely.

Look around your life and ask yourself, are you secure? When the clouds come do they bring a welcome drizzle or do they sit heavily overhead. When the sun shines, is it merciless in directing it’s heat at you, or does it caress your brow? When the wind blows, does it take your breath away and leave you straining to maintain your balance, or does it invigorate you, spur you on from behind?

How you see your life reflects how secure you are. In turn is reflected in what you give and get from others. When Aunt Flo and Uncle Zeke come to visit with their precocious grandchildren who they dote on, it can be a daunting prospect unless… you see it as a chance to spend some time with the relatives who had you during the summer break when your parents were working. Unless when you look at the grandchildren, you see tomorrow, and know that just for the day, or the weekend, you will have a chance to plant a positive seed for the future.

We all have our little nuances that can be irksome to others, we all have our own emotional needs and sometimes those need come to the fore when others are looking to us for strength and motivation. It is at this time, that togetherness is at its best. Have you ever said to anyone, ‘I’d love to be of help but right now, I’m not much good to myself?’ People who are generally secure in themselves will recognise the mood changes in others and reach out to them, even though they might need to reached out to. They say misery loves company. To an extent it’s true. People can find solidarity in each other because it shows that, they are not alone in struggling with their own togetherness.

Do you have a friend who calls up and says… ‘How’s your day been?’ and on hearing you’ve had a tough one, say’s ‘me too, let’s go spoil ourselves?’ Do you have a relative that seems particularly blue, but on hearing your blues suggests a pot of ice cream? Are you that person?

Togetherness isn’t just spending time in each other’s presence, it’s a phenomenon that is exhibited emotionally and spreads like the aroma of freshly baked bread, by the breeze. It touches all, some will stop and enjoy the aroma, some will smell it and let it pass without a second thought, some will not even notice. Which one are you?

About BaseeSaka

has written 156 post in this blog.

Having experienced most relationship issues, from dating, cohabiting and parting ways, to long distance relationship, ‘near misses’ and heartbreak; I feel that my years have been filled experiences. Experiences that I am inclined to describe as positive. You can email her at: