A Father’s Love is the true story of a father’s battle to be a part of his son’s life. You can read access all of the chapters in the Table of Contents.
After my size 14’s were surgically removed from Camille’s ass, you’d think she’d get some act right. Nope. Over the next year, I was dragged through the legal process.
She challenged the child support amount and wanted more money, so there was a hearing with the Division of Child Support. That took a couple hours. They didn’t change the amount.
Mandatory seminar that we had to attend on “What About the Children”. Wasted a whole afternoon for a state worker to show some videos and tell me to keep your children at the forefront of your decision making throughout this process. Duh. No sh*t!
Mediator sessions… several one hour sessions with a dude that has no real authority who is supposed to help us reach a resolution. I state what I want. She states what she wants. He says, do you think you can agree to what the other person wants. We say “No”. He asks for us to compromise. We say, “No.” And it continues for an hour for a couple weeks. I don’t know what he expects when he says, neither one of us has to agree to each other and his thoughts aren’t taken into consideration.
Court appearances – hearings to set dates for hearings and paperwork that states all of the other paperwork is filed. A lot of redundancy and time and money wasted.
Not to mention, the everyday madness of dealing with her. In a perfect world, people would follow court orders, but the reality is they aren’t worth much more than the paper they’re printed on. Court orders are for people that CHOOSE to follow them. They even tell you in the parenting seminar that if someone didn’t want to follow the court ordered parenting plan, the resources aren’t available to pursue them. At some point you could file to have them held in contempt of court, but that’s just another piece of paper. It really doesn’t mean sh*t.
In our state more than 99% of cases get settled before they reach trial. Between all the mess they make you go through (you have to pay for it all yourself by the way), most parents come to an agreement. Only the serious cases go to trial. The key to all of the alternative dispute methods is that the parents have to agree and no one can make them agree. So of course Camille wouldn’t agree. I have comprised so much in the hopes of ending this bullsh*t, but she refuses. An example of one of the issues she won’t agree with is decision making. She wants sole decision making. Not because I can’t make decisions – she even said so herself – but she feels if she wants to make a decision regarding Isaiah she shouldn’t have to ask me. She won’t tell me about doctor appointments, speech therapy appointments, all in an effort to be in control. Petty BS!
The last part of the process before trial is for both of us to be interviewed by a social worker. It just so happens that our social worker is a middle aged woman that has no kids and never been married. It’s understandable because she’s ugly as hell. Well she interviewed Camille a couple of weeks before me and when she called me to set up my interview, I told her I couldn’t make the date she scheduled and asked to reschedule. She told me to take the date or leave it. I’m like, “what the f*ck?” I told her just like she has people to answer to, so I do. I live in that area and can’t make that appointment. Then she says, “Well I hope your child is important enough for you to be here.”
You can guess what happened next. I cursed her ass out. Eventually a judge got involved and I had the interview. It’s amazing how accommodating she became once she was standing in front of a judge and he asked her, why wasn’t this taken care of. She actually opened up her appointment book in front of me and told me to pick a date and time.
You could tell she was still mad when we finally met 2 months later for the interview. It really wasn’t an interview – I thought I was talking to Camille the way the social worker kept saying, “Why don’t you just agree to what she wants.” I’m thinking I have to answer BS questions about my life and childhood – not how Isaiah’s mother is “being generous if I get anything more than 4 hours a month.”
Apparently she didn’t realize who she was dealing with.
My brother always tells me that I need to learn how to let stuff go. When someone says or does something f*cked up, I will always check them. As much as the social worker needed to be checked, I should’ve let it go instead of putting my foot in her ass, and then emailing her boss as well.
A big mistake.
To be continued…