A Father’s Love – Waiting Game

A Father’s Love is the true story of a father’s battle to be a part of his son’s life.  You can read access all of the chapters in the Table of Contents.

The first thing Camille did was call child support and then email me like that was supposed to bother me.

I laughed and told her ass, “I don’t give a damn about child support. I pay 100% of everything from the shoes on his feet to the Cheerios you give him as a snack. Whether I volunteer to pay or it comes out of my check, I’m still paying so who gives a sh*t.” As a matter of fact, give me their number and my case number and I’ll call them so they won’t have to look for me.”

“I don’t know the case number.”

“Camille, you’re full of sh*t, how do you file a case and not have a case number? F*ck it, I’ll get it myself.  Oh, and I’ll be by to pick up Isaiah on Friday and my normal time.”


It took all of five minutes to get my case number from DCS. I gave them the information they needed and got started on Round 2. The money wasn’t an issue, especially since I figured Camille was in for a rude awakening. No matter how much I made, they weren’t going to order that I keep paying 100% of everything, plus Camille made very good money. She couldn’t budget for sh*t, but that’s her problem, not mine.

It would take a couple of weeks for them to finalize it, so I gave Camille her first dose of reality.  I had enough sense to know that once a case is started any money that is not given to DCS doesn’t count towards child support. Isaiah’ daycare tuition was due the next day, so I didn’t pay it. I’ve never paid his daycare late, but I read all the paperwork and I know they will hack on big ass late fees real quick. I didn’t even bother to call Camille. I knew the daycare would let her know that $970 was due.

Can anyone say payday loan? LOL!

I understand there is a reason why things have to be done a certain way, but why is the legal process, so damn difficult for fathers?! Do you know what a mother has to do to file a parental case against a man? Go to the courthouse, fill out a form, and that’s it. Your ass got a case.

But what did I have to do?

First, I had to make an appointment with a counselor from Family court services to explain that I’d like to file a Parenting Plan case. I went to the courthouse and then was given an appointment line number to call. You could only call Monday – Thursday between 9-11am to make an appointment. I found this out at 11:17 am.

Damn that’s one day wasted.

The waiting game

When I called at 9 the next morning, I was on hold for 45 mins before I finally spoke to someone and got an appointment for the end of the following week. And I had to pay for the appt. It was just $10, but still, I thought the courthouse gave you free info, or at least I thought my taxes would cover it. But anyways, at the appointment I explained the situation and was advised I needed to file a Parenting Plan action.

I’m thinking, “No sh*t Sherlock. They pay you for this?!” Since Camille and Isaiah lived in a different county, I would have to file my case there. Again, I knew all this. Then it got tricky…

Because I wasn’t the mother I had to prove paternity. Before Isaiah could leave with me from the hospital, Camille and I had to sign a paternity affidavit that states neither one of us believe any other man could be the father. Signing the birth certificate is meaningless. It’s the affidavit that the state cares about. I had to go get an original copy of that affidavit from the state Vital Statistics department at the Capital.

I was like, “Damn, we can’t call from here and order it.”

“No sir. We don’t know if you’re the same person that signed the form. What?! Would I be here if I wasn’t?”

But I was like alright. He gave me instructions on the forms and a web link where I can get the forms from. Hmmm, so I waited a week and paid $10 for some info I could’ve gotten off the web for free? You could’ve had a flyer on the wall with the web address and I would’ve gotten the info, but whatever… can’t knock the hustle.

So I drove an hour to the vital stats place and placed an order. Well after they took my license… asked me when and where was Isaiah born… and Camille’s full name (sh*t, you’d think they were the ones that f*cked her)… I had to pay $45 cash, well actually $49 if you count the $2 their ATM charged me and the $2 my bank charged me for using their ATM. Who carries cash nowadays? And then I was told I would receive the affidavit by mail in 3 – 6 weeks. I just stared at the dude, like you got to be kidding me, right?

He wasn’t.

A father can’t file a case without that affidavit, but a mother doesn’t need it. What the reasoning is that there is never any doubt about who the mother is, but the father could be questioned. It makes sense except all I was doing was FILING TO START A F*CKING CASE! I wasn’t asking you to give me sole custody, I just wanted to start the process! I mean damn lawmakers, help a brotha out!

So at this point, all I could do was wait.

To be continued…

About willwavvy

Will Wavvy has written 349 post in this blog.

My life is dedicated to educating and empowering others to make healthy relationship choices. I write about, and answer questions about relationships in my never-ending quest to help people stay in love long after they've fallen in love.