A Second Chance At Love

 

I am going to try to sum this up into a short story/question.

I met a friend we got married and after being together for 8 years I met another man who piqued my interest and I thought the grass was greener so I took a walk over on that field.  He and I have stayed together for 7and 1/2 years before he started playing too many games.  He claimed he was never with another woman and basically he wanted to see if he could manipulate me into doing what he wanted.  Well during this time of going mad I ran into my ex and we became friends again and after a few weeks we started talking about us and I explained my situation and how hurt I was and I couldn’t do another relationship.  However to get to the point he has helped me through the pain and healing process (no sex involved, strictly a true friend) and now he wants to know if I would marry him again.

Nic’s Thoughts

Well for starters this man is taking a courageous step in forgiving what you did. If I read you right, you left him for someone else and it didn’t work out. So with that it brings up a possible problem. The first thing you’ll need to know? Has he truly forgiven you? Is it really in the past, because you don’t want old problems and mistrust to brew. If you both didn’t resolve that within yourselves it’s bound to rear its ugly head sooner or later. If that’s not going to be problem than yes you can move forward and rebuild.

If you’ve chosen to reunite a good thing to keep in mind is that you’ll both need to rebuild trust. And you need to build it with each other, you for him taking you back and not being suspicious on why. On his end being able to put the past events to rest and many more. As far as remarrying is concerned, I’d recommend taking it slow. Marriage should taken very serious, you can both recouple without necessarily going back into a marriage right away. It sounds like a lot of time has passed, and because of time you are both very different people. So this a great time to not only heal from the past events but to also build a renewed friendship. It sounds like the guy has already did his part on that. But you did mention that you were hurt from the prior drama. So how do you feel at this point?

It sounds like he’s at a good point, but what about you? It’s important to know where you stand emotionally. Any relationship you rekindle with him or anyone is going to be dependent on this. So the suggestion I can give, is to make sure you both have a serious talk if you decide that’s what you want to pursue. A lot is at stake so it’d be wise to discuss where you want things to go. Make sure you know what you can handle, and whether you’re able to give that to him. By having that talk you’re already taking the steps to rebuilding that trust. Its a good sign to show that you’re willing to do it right and not risk his emotions by rushing into things. So can a second chance at love work? It’s been heavily debated, but I believe you guys can make it work. But that will require lots of trust and communication. I hope this helps! Best of luck…..

-Nic

About Nick Campbell

Nick Campbell has written 163 post in this blog.

A modern day gentleman who loves to explore all aspects of relationships and discuss problems this new generation faces in love. Born and raised in the Bay Area, well traveled and cultured. Single Dad, tech connoisseur and news junkie. Drop a line if there is something you'd like discussed!