21 Booty Call Rules

This was sent to us by, Sheila F, a fan of our Face book page.  Now while we don’t recommend being in a booty call situation, if you’re going to do it, you mind as well do it right.  If you don’t follow these rules you may end up – dare we say it… catching feelings and actually want to be in a relationship with someone.  Do people still do that? LOL!

Here are the Rules…

1. No sleeping over – unless it is very good and we need to repeat it in the morning.

2. No meeting in public no matter what the reason is.

3. No calls before 9 PM – we don’t have ish to talk about.

4. None of that “lovemaking” ish – only sex allowed.

5. No emotional discussions (i.e. Where are we heading with this? Do you love me?) The answer is no, so don’t ask.

6. No plans made in advance – that is why you are called the “backup,” unless you are from out-of-town, then it’s only a one-time advanced arrangement.

7. All gifts accepted – money is always good.

8. No “baby” talk – however, dirty talk is encouraged.

9. No asking for comparisons with former lovers – it’s really none of your damn business.

10. No calling each other “friends with privileges” we are not friends, just sex buddies.

11. Calling out the wrong name during sex is OK – don’t be offended.

12. No extra clothing – I don’t want your ass leaving anything behind when you leave.

13. No falling asleep right after sex – it’s over, so get your ass up, get dressed and go the eff home.

14. Don’t be offended if I don’t ask if you enjoyed it – I don’t care.

15. You cannot borrow my car for any reason.

16. If anyone asks who you are, the standard response will be: “My roommate’s girlfriend/boyfriend.”

17. Doggie style is the preferred position – the reason is less eye contact the better.

19. No condoms, no effin’. Carry your ass home.

20. Bring your own drink – I am not your liquor store.

21. No phone use, please – don’t want anyone calling back looking for your ass.

Bonus rule: You can do away with most of these rules and just go to services such as, Ashley Madison, that are just for women and men looking for booty calls.

Are there any other rules you can think of?

About willwavvy

Will Wavvy has written 322 post in this blog.

My life is dedicated to educating and empowering others to make healthy relationship choices. I write about, and answer questions about relationships in my never-ending quest to help people stay in love long after they've fallen in love.

  • Shorty707

    NO KISSING!!!

  • Rachel

    No kissing on the forehead, no lying in bed and having conversations, NO CUDDLING AFTER SEX!!!!

  • Duckface

    I can’t take this seriously if there is no fucking 18.

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  • http://www.relationshipplaybook.com Will Wavvy

    Looks like #18 is missing

  • Brightstar_9

    Wait….did I miss #18?

  • Kt Szrot

    And for the love of god, I’m not bangin you at your parents house. Thanks.

  • Kt Szrot

    Hooking up with ur friends or vice versatile is ok. We are not in a relationship. Strictly fuckin. Don’t ask don’t tell basis

  • Kt Szrot

    No asking for $ to “borrow”…….just bc you’re fucking ME doesn’t mean you can fuck my wallet too. (buying drinks is better)

  • Ashleymadison

    No more than twice a week.