Taking One For the Team

By: Will Wavvy

Dear Dick

You know you’re my dog and we’ve been through some shit together.
You will always be a part of me, but we gotta talk.
Understand that I’m NOT hatin.’
Do your thing playboy, but you should know, I’m tired of this “taking one for the team bullshit!”
It’s been going on for way too long now and it needs to stop.
She treats you so much better than she treats me.

What am I talking about?!
You know damn well what I’m talking about!
I can’t stand her, but I keep “taking one for the team”, just to keep you happy.
She treats you so much better than she treats me.

She curses me… but blesses you.
When she sees you, she grins from ear to ear… when she sees me, she frowns.
She tells you that she loves you… she tells me she can’t stand my ass.
She calls you to get rid of her headaches… she tells me to “shut the fuck up” because I’m giving her a headache.
She tells me I’m no good… but tell you, you’re the best she’s ever had.

I can’t get her to spend any time with me… but she’ll call in sick and risk getting fired just to see you.

It’s bullshit I tell you.  Bullshit!

Mad at dick
I’m not hatin’… well maybe I am a little… but I’m tired of this “taking one for the team bullshit.”
She treats you so much better than she treats me.

She constantly compliments you and tells you how wonderful you look.
The bigger you get, the more she smiles… but yet I gain a few pounds and she tells me to take my fat ass to the gym.
She even tells you she loves your imperfections.
She says the way you curve is perfect… it’s as if you were made just for her… but yet she’s always clowning my big ass head.

I’m not hatin’… well maybe I am a little… but I’m tired of this “taking one for the team bullshit.”
She treats you so much better than she treats me.

When you’re down, she eagerly pumps you up… yet I’m the one on the grind.
I work all damn day and she’s too tired to get me a glass of water… yet you work for a half hour and she’ll eagerly cook for, feed, and bathe you.
She’ll hop her ass in the bed with me, in big ass granny drawls with her nappy ass bush, ugly ass head scarf, hairy ass legs, smelling like yesterday’s meatloaf; but let her come to bed with you…she’s wearing a thong – or nothing at all, she’s freshly shaved, smelling heavenly, and even has her wig tight at 1 am.

I’m not hatin’… well maybe I am a little… but I’m tired of this “taking one for the team bullshit.”
She treats you so much better than she treats me.
So what are WE gonna do?

If you’d like to share your own Dick Diaries entry and send it to: dickdiaries@relationshipplaybook.com

You can email me at: willwavvy@relationshipplaybook.com

About willwavvy

Will Wavvy has written 349 post in this blog.

My life is dedicated to educating and empowering others to make healthy relationship choices. I write about, and answer questions about relationships in my never-ending quest to help people stay in love long after they've fallen in love.

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